One of the dark truths of our industry is that management often attracts people who should not be managers of vulnerable groups of people. When you work in a lot of clubs over time you start to notice a pattern emerges.
Many of them are men with narcissistic personality disorders. They devalue their dancers. They scheme on their dancers. They silence their dancers. They put ego over business. They put quick money over a long term relationships with their dancers.
You try to go to management for help with various problems or threats and you…are treated as if you’re the problem for mentioning it.
You try to create a good working relationship with management and they…devalue you, a club asset, by ignoring your input, dismissing you, and insulting you.
You try to stay positive and do your job and they belittle and verbally abuse you.
How do you survive this?
Keep using the survival skills you have that allow you to be a dancer now.
Identify the problem managers. Once you’ve noticed some negative behaviors from them you are aware and can protect yourself from them.
Disengage. Hold their negativity at arm’s length from you. Don’t buy into their stories about who you are. Nod along. Play them back.
Remind yourself of the value that dancers bring to the table. Dancers are the biggest asset of the club! You are a valuable resource to them. You may not get respect, but know that you deserve respect.
It’s a tough situation! A toxic manager can make your life hell. But you may leave one just to find another. Keep going. You’ve got this! 🙏🏻
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